Proper holidays - well, nearly

I'm back home after a whole SIX DAYS away. I know it's not long really, but for me it felt like an age. So many people have said to me 'you need a break', but it's hard to get back into the habit of taking holidays of any length when for so long it's been necessary to stay close to home.
It's only now I can take holidays again that I've considered how long ago my last proper holiday was. There've been short breaks - a couple of nights at Curious Arts Festival, another two in Edinburgh with my daughter - but 2015 is the most recent that I've been away for longer (three nights in Edinburgh, and four nights near St Davids in Pembrokeshire). As my parents' health deteriorated it just wasn't possible to leave home.

Free Fringe on the Royal Mile

Now I'm free to go away where and when I choose - and it's strange. Amongst other concerns, I find there are so many places I want to re-visit, and so many new ones to discover, that I don't know where to begin. We spent two nights at Timber festival in July, tested the whole 'going away' idea at the beginning of this month with two nights in Norfolk and now we've taken a whole five nights away from home!

Portobello beach

Loch Crinan - somewhere in the distance Iain Banks
 situated the fictional town of Gallanach

This time we headed North, first spending two nights just outside Edinburgh, hoping to see some of the Fringe festival and a bit of the coast. Then, while so many visitors to Scotland are heading off to the North Coast 500 route, we went west to Argyll, the setting for Iain Banks' novel, The Crow Road. (I took so many photos I had to split this section into two posts - Loch Fyne and Crinan; part one ; part two )I think folk are definitely missing out by dashing straight up north, but it keeps this lesser known area free of the tourist bustle.

Loch Sween

Both are places we know well, and have visited several times. Unfortunately it meant we knew of so many things to do, and places to visit, that attempting them all was impossible in the short time we had. Edinburgh was fun though, but Argyll was better, especially with our daughter along and persuading me to go swimming one evening in a sea loch. There'll be more photos to follow - but none of the swimming :)

Counting Down to Timber Festival

The sun is out at last, and Timber Festival is nearly here.

We've been and bought some new camping beds, we spent Saturday (hottest day of the year so far!) checking that we remembered how to put up the tent, and I even made some bunting!









Now it's time for the serious planning.
Day splits have been released, and as I'm attending as part of the 'press' (how cool is that?) I already have a programme.
So, highlighter pens at the ready, I'm flipping through the pages, backwards and forwards, forwards and backwards, marking the musicians I really want to see perform, the discussions I want to hear, the activities I want to take part it.
It's supposed to be a laid-back non-stressful festival, one to re-awaken you to the healing affects of nature in general and woodland in particular, but unfortunately, probably like so many others, I'm still stuck in my day-to-day approach to life, thinking 'Can I dash from a meditation class to the discussion on Slow Living?' which is frankly ridiculous. I need to stop and slow down BEFORE I arrive at Timber.

So, instead of my usual style of planning which tries to fill every second of the day, I'm going to be more relaxed, prepared to adapt my plans, and not stress about seeing/doing everything.
Having said that, I DO have a list of things I would most like to see/hear/do.


First up has to be Extinction Rebellion. They've been in the press a lot recently, and I certainly believe we should stop hiding our heads in the sand, and face up to the facts about climate change while it can be slowed down. Hopefully their message won't be all doom and gloom.
The Rewilding Panel promises to challenge everything we thought about conservation and ecosystem management. I'm hoping to hear more about projects such as the reintroduction of beavers and, more controversially, wolves to wild areas of Scotland. While over at the Slow Living Panel I want to discover what's behind the concept of living slowly and seasonally. With home grown vegetables from our allotment and garden, I think we may be further on this path than some but I would hardly describe my life as 'slow'.

One of the highlights of last year's festival was Seek, Find, Speak - a dramatisation of the Robert Macfarlane/Jackie Morris book The Lost Words, this year Forest of Dreams offers a reworking of Red Riding Hood described as a "fabulous feast of wonder and terror, darkness and light", and The Baron in the Trees promises aerial acrobatics as Italo Calvino's novel is brought to life in the tress of Fearnedock.

There's music of one sort or another on almost continuously throughout the weekend but the artists I most want to catch are Stealing Sheep, Sheelanagig, Thyla, Gwenno, The Trials of Cato, Another Sky, Thom Ashworth, Magpahi, and Hannah Peel and Will Burns. At night, while the music continues on the big stage, elsewhere there'll be campfire bands and story-telling, enchanted woodland puppets, and outdoor cinema (including The Blair Witch Project! My husband claims to have never seen this so what better location for a first viewing than in a dark forest?)

I want to find my way out of the maze, try forest bathing, laughing yoga, forest meditation, a mindful drawing workshop, and a flatfooting dance workshop. In separate events I could improve my identification of birds, trees and moths. And ... and ... and ...  I'm ending up with just too many plans; some may have to be abandoned.

For personal reasons I want this weekend to be about switching off from everyday life, and finding a quiet space within me. So no rushing, no manic chasing from one event to the next. It's time to slow down, and learn how to Think Like a Tree.

Learning from my daughter

Back at the end of February, we loaded the car and headed north, carrying our youngest's gear up to her new flat in Manchester. It felt like a bit of a rushed move due to her work commitments, and I don't think the enormity of it had sunk in with any of us.

March passed in a blur , by the beginning of April I decided things had to change though now, looking back on the month, I realise they didn't. I was so unprepared for this new empty nest phase, but it was only when reading my daughter's blog posts on the same subject that I understood how badly I was coping.



In a series of posts my daughter has been talking about this new phase of life from her perspective, the problems encountered and how she's starting to overcome them. It's nice to know she's starting to feel settled and learning how to cope with her new responsibilities BUT it highlighted the fact that I'm not!


As a long-term stay-at-home mum, my life has revolved around my daughters, with routines dictated by their needs - from afternoon naps, to school run, or taxiing to the station. When my elder daughter left home, I still had a small child to look after, so I didn't notice this emptiness. This time round, things are very different. What I've realised is that without anyone (ie my youngest daughter) checking up on how I'm living my life, I've dropped into some lazy habits. You'd think having a husband around would make a difference, but men don't notice that inch of dust building up in a corner, or the ever-growing ironing pile (or, at least, mine doesn't), and see ready meals and takeaways as just a convenience rather than a lack of enthusiasm for cooking.


So, I'm going to take some advice from my daughter. Her post about What Is and Isn't Self-care made me acknowledge that basically I'm just slobbing about. High and Low Level Adulting had me thinking that I'm going about things back to front, avoiding the basics but trying to do the clever stuff. I have no real NEED to get up and about in the mornings, so I frequently get up late and waste an hour or so on social media before doing anything. I spend a lot of time looking at holiday sites - AirBnB, Canopy and Stars, anything that includes the word 'glamping' - even though I know that realistically I can't take holidays this year because of my parents' health. My staycation days out, while fun and at times a necessary bit of relaxation, are just procrastination tactics. Basically I think I'm looking for distractions to fill the daughter-shaped hole in my life, but going about it the wrong way. From now on, there'll be no more leaving the housework till I'm expecting a visitor, I'll re-apply myself to book blogging (which I've shamefully let drift) and try to discover what I want to do with my life for the next twenty or so years ...

If anyone has any helpful ideas on how to get through these first few awkward months, please share them!

2017 Highlights

I thought it would be hard to beat 2016 as a year full of activity and excitement, but 2017, particularly in its last few days, has managed to do just that!.

Sean McGowan

For starters, it's been a busy year out at gigs, from As December Falls at Rescue Rooms in January to Cameron Sinclair Harris's Christmas show at JT Soar, with over twenty others falling in between. Standout moments include the launch for my youngest daughter's EP Put Me Back , dancing around to Skinny Lister's shanty punk twice (in May and December ), watching the rise of Sean McGowan from a guy playing at gigs promoted by my daughter to one who can fill Nottingham's Bodega, and seeing Tom Odell jumping about on the top of a piano at Curious Arts Festival.

Tom Odell on that piano!

Due to an interesting line-up of productions, I seem to have been to the theatre more than usual, seeing a wide variety of plays from Chekhov's The Cherry Orchard to the boisterous romp of Cyrano. If I could see just one again though I'd pick Derby Theatre's production of Harold Pinter's Betrayal.

I went to a chocolate-making workshop as a treat from my elder daughter, and although my efforts didn't look very good, they tasted fine (which is what matters).

Because of the health of my parents, it isn't possible to go away for any length of time, so while my youngest went off to Italy alone, I had  to be content with a 'staycation'. I had lots of plans for it, and although we didn't follow all of them we did get out and about, finding new local places to explore and generally trying to holiday from home.

Felley bluebells

As winter moved into Spring, I walked through snowdrops, daffodils, and bluebells, and throughout summer I visited all my favourite local gardens (Chatsworth, Haddon, Calke, Kedleston) and discovered some new ones at Hopton Hall,  Lea , Melbourne Hall and Felley Priory.

Lea rhododendrons 

Pottering around gardens, even one like Lea perched on a hillside, is enjoyable but not very physically demanding, so, inspired by my youngest finishing Leicester marathon, I decided to take up running in a very lazy low key way - my theory is that any exercise is better than none!

I've been to less book events this year but did manage to catch US fantasy writer Robin Hobb at Nottingham Waterstones launching the last of her Fitz and the Fool series. I've discovered her work comparatively recently, and completely fallen for it. My hope was to read the whole series before publication of the last book, but with 15 books, each easily 600 pages long, and other reading commitments, that didn't work. I'm still making headway though, and will get there one day.






Over the summer at Chatsworth, there was an absolutely wonderful exhibition, House Style, showcasing clothes worn by current and previous generations of the Devonshire family.
And as Christmas approached I went round all the local stately homes - Chatsworth, Kedleston, Haddon, and Hardwick - to see them in their festive finery.

Arthur's Seat summit

I did manage two weekends away though.
In July, we went to Curious Arts Festival again, where I tested both my festival-going and outdoors credentials by putting up the tent in pouring rain and nearly getting the car stuck as we left! Then, in November, headed off for a fabulous weekend in Edinburgh with my daughter, where we climbed Arthur's Seat, visited museums and art galleries, and drank cocktails till 2 am!

Give or take, these were going to form the highlights of 2017, then in the days between Christmas and New Year, my grandson arrived two weeks early, and an event which should have started 2018, rounded off this year instead. Next year I suspect could be very different for us all ...

Skinny Lister again

Skinny Lister were back at Nottingham's Rescue Rooms last week, so of course I was along, singing, clapping, dancing (well, bouncing) and more singing.

This is the fourth time I've seen them, and to me they're a bit special. I'm late coming to live music so Skinny Lister were at my first festival, then my first 'real' gig, and the first time I went to Rescue Rooms - and I've loved every time.

How to describe a Skinny Lister gig to someone who's never seen them? 

Well, "shanty punk" is how they themselves describe their music - so imagine sea shanties with a 'rockier' beat mixed with some quieter 'folkier' tunes. 

What I love though is the atmosphere. You don't stand quietly and listen to the band, just applauding at the end of a song. Instead, you stomp your feet, clap your hands, and sing along. The band's enthusiasm and energy is just infectious! For that hour or whatever, the audience are all mates having a bit of a sing-song, led by the guys on stage. There's even a flagon of whisky passed down from the stage and around the audience!

 Previously it's been just me and my daughter along, but hubby decided he was missing out (we could have told him that before!) and came along too. He's claims to have enjoyed it but for a man who usually loves to sing embarrassing 'dad songs' out loud, he kept surprisingly quiet.  Even if he didn't know the words the choruses are easily picked up - and if in doubt singing 'too-rye-ay' fits in most places, as you'd expect with sea shanties.

I went home a bit deafened and a bit hoarse, got woken in the night by cramp in muscles I didn't know I had, could barely get downstairs next morning for stiff aching legs, but I had a brilliant night and refuse to believe I'm too old for this!

Skinny Lister - Rescue Rooms

I've already mentioned in passing my night out at Skinny Lister's Nottingham gig, but it was such amazing fun that I thought it was worth a bigger write up - and more pics.

I may be getting grown-up at last but I'm refusing to go gently into old age, and in eighteen  months I've gone from NEVER going to any kind of music event, to taking every opportunity I can, so when my youngest offered tickets for this gig as a birthday present I jumped at the offer. 

I've been listening to Skinny Lister's unique brand of shanty/rock for a year or so now, and, almost unbelievably, this is the third time I've seen them live (first at Curious Arts Festival, then at Nottingham's Bodega) and each time the crowd is bigger and more enthusiastic. 

What I love about their shows is that they feel like a big party. Everyone, from the teens bouncing about down at the front to the older folk clapping along more sedately, is caught up in the music, singing along, and having a fantastic time.

Lorna crowd-surfing

I was trying the other day to describe Skinny Lister's sound to someone who feels all modern music is either 'boy band' or 'dance anthems'. 

Tricky. 

It's not 'rock' or 'pop'. To call it toe-tapping, foot stomping music makes it sound like country barn dance music, which it's definitely not. Yes, you can still spot the folk music roots to their songs - whether loud, boisterous sea-shanty style songs or quieter ballads - but it's high energy, punk rock folk.

Whatever, I love it. 

So, I sang and stomped and bounced my way through their 90 minute set - and then comes the sad bit when I have to admit my age. Cramp waking me overnight. Aching legs the next day. 

But I'm not giving up ... I'm going to get fitter, and next time they're back in town, I'll be there to join in.

Busy, busy week

Ok, busy, busy week might be over-exaggerating just a little but two nights out together is quite excitement enough for me!
First on Tuesday I headed off to the Nottingham Waterstones store to see fantasy author Robin Hobb at a packed event to publicise the launch of the latest, and last, book in her long-running Fitz and the Fool series - for something that started as a scribbled note while she was in the middle of writing another book, it's come a long way.

Ayres at The Hop Merchant

Then on Wednesday there was even more excitement...
Not long after I saw Skinny Lister last autumn, my teen bought me an early birthday present of a ticket to their next gig back in Nottingham  - well, actually two tickets and she was going too.  As the date grew closer my excitement was mounting. Then last week she realised she'd booked herself a (much smaller) gig at the Hop Merchant pub in Nottingham for the same night. Fortunately, the times didn't clash. She'd have to dash straight off after her set, and we'd miss the supporting act at Rescue Rooms, neither of which are best etiquette, but it was do-able.
So, an early, hurried dinner, a traffic-problem free trip to Nottingham, and on to my teen's half-hour slot.



Then a quick dash across town for her to take her guitar back to the car, while I strolled the short distance to the Rescue Rooms - and on to the main act of the evening, Skinny Lister and their hand-clapping, toe-tapping sea-shanty style rock.








Unbelievably, it's the third time I've seen Skinny Lister play in ten months. Six months ago I hadn't been to a gig larger than anything held in the back or upper room of a pub - and I can't quite believe how my 'habits' have changed.

A hectic evening, but a great one, and this is definitely now the 'new me'. Overnight my legs cramped up from so much jigging about, the next day I had aches everywhere, but I'm already looking for the next date Skinny Lister will be back in town!

Back at Chameleon - Lewis Fieldhouse and Dave Giles

Lewis Fieldhouse

It was back to the good old Chameleon Arts Cafe last week to catch the Nottingham leg of Lewis Fieldhouse and Dave Giles' "Pay What You Want" tour. (It shows how my habits have changed to even start to think of going BACK to a venue)

It was an unusual gig in a couple of ways - firstly ticket prices. Entry was (as you might guess from the tour's name) 'pay what you want', so you could pay £10/20/more for a ticket, pay less with maybe the intention of buying a cd, or if you were short of cash this week, or could only drop in for an hour, you could get in for as little as, well, nothing. It seems to be 'all win' for the punter - it's as cheap as going to a pub open mic and the music's better. For the guys on tour though it seems a bit risky - after all they've put money up front to pay for venue hire, travelling and lodgings, and might not recoup those costs. I suppose the hope is that whereas as tickets at, say, a tenner might put folk off going to see two musicians they've never heard of, people can go along for free, listen to the music and either add to the donation bucket, or buy cds and merch. It's a gamble, and I'd love to know how often it pays off, but it doesn't seem polite to ask!

Dave Giles

Second unusual thing?  Instead of the regular 'headliner plus supports' set-up, the two guys were sharing the honours evenly. So there was no local (relatively) unknown to start the evening but straight into music from the guys you've gone along to see; a 30 minute set from Lewis Fieldhouse, followed by same length by Dave Giles, and after a short break they both came back with 40 minutes sets each. Again, it seems a win win situation for the punter - it gives the audience more time to get a feel for each performer's music, or if you can only get along for part of the evening you're still likely to catch one set from the musician you wanted to see.

We thoroughly enjoyed the evening (though some heating in the room wold have been nice). Both artists fall into the singer/songwriter, one man and his guitar, though with different styles of music. I'm hopeless at trying to describe music in any meaningful way so go and listen to them both on Spotify or Bandcamp or whatever; I shall be doing!

While the teen's away ...

As my teen's been away for the past few days in Rome, I thought it only fair that I too had a bit of a special weekend. So, in between the boring adult stuff like grocery shopping and a trip to Ikea, I went out to a couple of slightly more fun things ...

James Veck-Gilodi (Deaf Havana)

First up was an afternoon appearance by Deaf Havana at Nottingham Rough Trade to promote their new album, All These Countless Nights. Now, they've long been a favourite band of the teen's and she's seen them live several times, but I hadn't.

The audience space wasn't very big, and was absolutely jam-packed, making it difficult to see the band but, after so many years of listening to Deaf Havana cds and vinyls, it was great to hear them live at last.

Kevin Devine

Monday night (this was a long weekend after all) was time to head to Bodega, where US acts Kevin Devine and Laura Stevenson were playing, supported on the UK stage of their tour by The Lion and The Wolf, and, in Nottingham, by local singer/songwriter George Gadd. It was actually the opportunity to sneak out on my own (without the teen) and see George Gadd that drew me along, but I seem fated to always miss him - previously events have clashed and this weekend confusion over timings plus traffic problems on the way meant we arrived for just his last song. Strange to say, of the other acts, I enjoyed The Lion and the Wolf (actually one guy, named Thomas George) most, maybe because I've heard his music on line, and was certainly surprised that after three quiet-ish, acoustic acts Kevin Devine proved to have a noisier rock sound. All great fun though (and maybe one of these days I'll get to see George Gadd)



Walking back to the car it wasn't possible to miss the Big Wheel in the Market Square, but that was something I wasn't going to try - I'd rather take photographs from safe on the ground.

Here we go again ... off out gigging

As December Falls

I've had rather a long Christmas break with NO going out, so here we are almost through January and only on the first gig of the year - though when you consider that this time last year I barely went to gigs, that sentence alone shows how much my life has changed!
Anyway, on Saturday evening I went to Nottingham to see a young local rock band - As December Falls - playing their biggest gig to date, at the Rescue Rooms. I've been listening to them on Spotify and such for a while (they've got rather a Paramore sort of sound, if you want to check them out), but never had the chance to see them live before.

There were four support acts but we only arrived in time to see the last one - Hello Tomorrow with a half hour set. They've an interesting sound and are another band I'll be checking out again.

Hello Tomorrow

And I had to treat myself to some merch. Although it will get worn before, I think this will make a brilliant Christmas t-shirt for next December!

Big Gig - Frank Turner at Rock City

Way back in January when my teen heard about my resolution of 'getting a new life' she thought my ideas would be a bit too tame. It was all very well to head off to the pub and listen to new music, but she thought I should stretch my boundaries a little further to include a 'big gig' - with a well-known performer who I couldn't casually approach and chat to afterwards, and at a venue large enough that I'd be lost in the crowd. 

Well, last Friday I got my chance, as Frank Turner and the Sleeping Souls were headlining at Nottingham's Rock City. Now among the bands and musicians that I'd consider going along to see, Frank Turner is the biggest, the most popular, the star. He's huge! Next week he'll be playing another show in Nottingham, an anniversary party as it's his 2000th gig. But he's a bit of a 'marmite' performer - if you don't know who he is, I could talk all night and you'd still never know; if you do, well I don't need to say more!
So I was delighted when the teen agreed that I could go along with her - on the usual proviso that I could be left somewhere safely at the back while she had fun.
In the event, the 'challenge' proved a little more tasking, as she didn't feel well enough to come along, so I ended up taking my other half instead. Now, bear in mind that neither of us has ever been to an event like this before, I didn't even know where the venue was, that I've had doubts before about feeling too old for such events and was fully expecting to stick out like a sore thumb, and you'll see how daunting it seemed.

As it turned out, everything went like clockwork, and it was the most fun EVER!

Timings for the evening were early so we had no hope of getting there to catch the earlier acts, and the place was jammed full when we arrived ... but, by luck rather than judgement, I found a gap just behind the sound booth with a clear view of the stage over the heads of the youngsters in the mosh pit. Staying further back put us in with a slightly older crowd and when Frank came out on stage, started singing 'I Knew Prufrock Before He got Famous' and I joined in, I almost wished I'd been down in the noisy pit!

I'm not quite the die-hard fan that some are but I knew the words to most of the songs, and sang, clapped and jigged my way through the two hour set. It was great to hear Frank give a shout out to the Safe Gigs For Women initiative part way through his set, and not even having beer spilled down me by an overenthusiastic dancer could put a dampener (lol) on my mood.
Even hubby had a good time, though he's less enthusiastic that I am to repeat the experience. 

Through social media I know someone who is going to four concerts of this tour. It seemed a strange, unnecessary thing when I first heard about it - after all, it's going to be more or less the same each night, surely? But now I understand. 

Something that can't be appreciated on cd or vinyl, is just how great a showman Frank Turner is, whether dancing and jumping about the stage, talking to the crowd, or encouraging them to outperform other audiences. There's the most incredible buzz, a feeling that everyone in the audience is not just watching, but actively taking part in the show. It turns out I'm not too old for this at all, so I'll be back, on my own if necessary - and if anyone reading this has tickets they don't want for Frank's special 2000th gig back at Rock City next week, well, you know where to find me.

Just going to add an edit, that my teen would never forgive me if I went along next week. She has tickets to go with her mates, and mum being along, even far away in the crowd, would cramp her style.