Jottings 29th November - rollercoaster

 This last full week of lockdown seems to have been the most unsettled of them all, feeling up one day and down the next. I normally try to abide by the 'change what you can, accept what you can't' maxim, and I think it's got me through this year okay, but this last week it seems to have deserted me.

I've worried about things I can't fix, fretted about coronavirus updates and the government's attitude, and been generally tired and irritable.

To settle myself I've tried to keep occupied, revamping an old skirt during the decreasing daylight hours, playing Lego Lord of the Rings on the Wii once it's dropped dark (Lara Croft was proving too troublesome so I've opted for something easier), putting together lunch from allotment vegetables, going out for walks once rush hour traffic has settled and everyone else is inside, and knitting a cardigan at night while watching tv (Black Mirror and Schitt's Creek this week).

News about the virus has been varied. On the plus side, we'll be able to meet family at Christmas -  there are six of us, in three households, with no grandparents, siblings, or in-laws to consider; for once being a small tight family is a good thing - and a vaccine seems really likely, perhaps even as early as next week for the highest priority cases. On the down side, we're moving from lockdown immediately into Tier 3 - so no quick catch-ups with my daughters, as neither live in the same area, and it's really hit home how long 'normal' life has been disrupted by coronavirus. 

As always I've tried to find little things to cheer me up and help me through this 'down' phase - the Christmas cactus coming into flower, 

the glow of the back garden birch tree in sunshine,

 

the sparkle of morning frost on house and car roofs, 

the bright technicolor display of sunset. These aren't big things but they do help.

To match my mood most of the week was dull and dreary, but Friday, despite the forecast of black cloud, was a day of glorious sunshine. Unfortunately it was too late to organise going out but at sunset I headed up to the playing fields to watch the dramatic sunset. A few minutes of peace in a troublesome week.

To round the week off in a fitting sort of manner, I dyed my hair thinking it would improve the dull lifeless feel it's had of late, and then wasn't happy with the result. When I bought the dye I thought I'd try a different lighter shade, hoping for something not as strident as my usual dark brown. I've ended up with a reddish colour, not a natural-looking brown, not a vibrant red, but a somewhere in between, obviously dyed colour. A bit like the rest of this year, I can't wait to see it go.